Andrew was born in Michigan and grew up in New Jersey. Please do not hold this against him. He now lives in Brooklyn. Andrew and his wife share their apartment with two cats: El Gordo and Mr. Squeakers. Those are not their actual names, but it's ok because cats don't really listen, anyway.

If Andrew had a time machine, he would first perform some preventative maintenance by visiting his child self to explain the benefits of flossing. Then Andrew would visit his teenage self and tell him to be more relaxed around girls. In order to protect the time-space continuum, Andrew would try not to step on any plants or insects, and he wouldn't bet on any sporting events.

If Andrew were an action figure, he would not have a kung-fu grip, turntables, or a wicked awesome motorcycle. Instead, the Andrew Action Figure would have an expandable belly because Andrew's super power is the ability to consume many pancakes in one sitting. Andrew's wife thinks his superhero name would be either "Jive Turkey" or "Crankypants."

Andrew listens to a lot of music, and he cannot play basketball very well. According to his friends, family, and scientists at the Mayo Clinic, Andrew has an extremely unhealthy obsession with pop culture.